Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I Feel Stuck

Loyal readers,

I apologize for not having many entries lately. Work has been going well, but I am often exhausted and just need to veg out and watch TV. Either that or I go to bed insanely early.

To be honest, I feel stuck.

While I know that this foot surgery was a good thing, I occasionally think that I may have made a mistake. I feel so helpless and I am not sure that all that I have been through is going to be worth it in the long run.

Part of me knows that I am in the middle of an life changing experience. When this is over, I will be able to walk more safely and efficiently. I have already learned to let go of control of the little details of my life and my patience has increased exponentially.

But the powerful, doubting part of me, worries about the effectiveness of the surgery. What if I have gone through all of this (despite the positive changes) and I walk worse than before?

I know that this is probably just a touch of depression and please, loyal readers, don't take this entry has as me looking for pity.

Please pray for me as I see the doctor tomorrow for a check-up. I am hoping for good news that will help my attitude turns around.

Thanks once again for reading and for your prayers and support.

God bless,

Devin

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